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Dinner Party Explosion

Dinner Party Explosion

Posted by on Sep 25, 2013 in SLH Excerpts | 0 comments

From Sex, Life, & Hannah::Volume 3, Summer Season (CHAPTER 27: SWINGING BOTH WAYS)

“Hannah, you know I love you!” Clark breaks into a bright smile.

“Oh god, you do!” Chopper yells out.

I pray Clark doesn’t say something that’s going to annihilate my wedding plans.

“And as much as it pains me to see you betrothed to another”—Clark raises his glass to Christian, spilling red wine all over the roast—“I’ve decided I like him.” Christian tips his head to Clark.

But then…

“I like him so much better than what’s-his-name,” Clark goes on, “and that writer you were having relations with for a while,” and on, “and our old roommate, Ben, who was way too young for you” and on, “and I definitely did not approve of the affair you were having with your boss.” And on.

Christian puts his arm around me and squeezes. “And no explosions from all that?”

I say nothing, and Christian prods Clark on.

“I even like him better than that gorgeous doctor you couldn’t stop going on about after he wouldn’t take you back.”

I feel Christian give me a tighter squeeze.

“You know why I like him better?” Clark takes another sip of wine. “Because when I asked him why he wanted to marry you…” Clark pauses dramatically. “He told me he wanted to grow old with you.”

The table claps, and then Jackie lifts her wine glass and stands. “I want to make a toast, too.” She clears her raspy voice. “I always thought my baby would follow in my footsteps; that he’d take over the family business and end up with one of my wonderful girls.”

Jackie allows Clark to pour her more wine. “But when that one floozy you hooked up with, whom I trusted to manage my bar, left you at the altar…”

I feel Christian’s grip around my shoulders loosen.

Did she just say “altar”?

Jackie takes a large swig of her wine. “Six months pregnant and all.”

Christian’s hand drops.

“I realized he needed someone more…responsible. Like you, Hannah.” As Jackie lifts her wine glass toward me, I can still only concentrate on altar and pregnant.

“Hannah,” she goes on, “after everything that Christian’s been through, professionally and personally, he’s never stopped talking about you. So I gotta believe he’s going after his destiny.”

The table once again erupts in loud applause.

I wrap my fingers around my wine glass and lift it to my lips. Slowly. Because it feels heavy. Christian looks at me uncomfortably. I take a sip.

I tell Christian that I think I’ve just exploded.

To Be Continued…

COPYRIGHT
Sex, Life, & Hannah::Volume 3, Spring Season by Dorota Skrzypek.
Copyright 2012 by Dorota Skrzypek.
ISBN 0-9768869-2-1
All Rights Reserved.

Read the entire Sex, Life, & Hannah Summer Season on Amazon now!

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Blowing Reality

Blowing Reality

Posted by on Aug 30, 2013 in SLH Excerpts | 0 comments

From Sex, Life, & Hannah::Volume 3, Summer Season (CHAPTER 26: WHAT HAPPENED IN VEGAS)

An hour, sixty dollars, and three stiff drinks later, I look up as my sister sits down next to me.

She lights up and tells the bartender she’d like a Belver Bears straight up. He tells her it’ll be a couple minutes, that someone will have to bring out a bottle; he reaches for the phone, but Holly snaps, “Belvedere will be fine.”

I sip my drink nervously. “So, did you win?”

She shakes her head. “It’s all gone.”

My eyes widen. “All? What do you mean, all? How much is all gone?”

Holly blows out a plume of smoke. “I told you—twenty grand.”

I gasp. “In an hour? How is that even possible?”

Holly looks away from me. “Baccarat.” She picks up the glass the bartender places in front of her. “When Lucas and I were here, he had this strategy: Bet one thousand a hand ’til you’re up one hundred percent and then go to two thousand. But I kept losing, so I started getting nervous and I lowered my bet to five hundred, and it all still kept going…”

I start rubbing my temples. “Let me get this straight: You took the last of all your money in the world and bet one thousand dollars a hand? That was your strategy?” It’s official: my sister is not in touch with reality. “You know, you’re not rich anymore, Holly.” I lower my voice so as not to draw attention. “You can’t just toss thousands of dollars at your problems and make them go away. You have to be like the rest of us now and work really hard for that kind of money. And most likely at a job you don’t like.” This is starting to feel like a really bad hangover.

Holly doesn’t say anything and slams down her vodka. She clears her throat. “Get your stuff together. We’re meeting Aunt Helen at the Bunny Ranch.”

To Be Continued…

COPYRIGHT
Sex, Life, & Hannah::Volume 3, Spring Season by Dorota Skrzypek.
Copyright 2012 by Dorota Skrzypek.
ISBN 0-9768869-2-1
All Rights Reserved.

Read the entire Sex, Life, & Hannah Summer Season on Amazon now!

Read More

Almost Getting Spanked

Almost Getting Spanked

Posted by on Aug 23, 2013 in SLH Excerpts | 0 comments

From Sex, Life, & Hannah::Volume 3, Summer Season (CHAPTER 25: RING AROUND THE POLE)

The bouncer opens Jumbo’s door for me.

Inside Jumbo’s, the lights are dimmed, the stage is empty, and Christian is counting money to the light of a desk lamp. He’s wearing that burgundy polo he wore on our official first date. I smile. I always did like the way that polo hugged his body.

I sashay past him, wanting him to notice, around to his side of the bar.

He looks up as I approach.

I lay my purse down and wrap my arms around him. “Is this your next career move—Company Man turned Jumbo Clown Room Bookkeeper?” I tease.

He puts down a wad of bills. “You really do wanna get spanked, don’t you?”

I run my hands over his chest, giggling. “I take my sexting very seriously.”

He writes down some numbers on a piece of paper. “Well, laugh all you want, but this place has paid my mom’s bills steadily for a very long time.”

“I don’t doubt it; you have great reviews on Yelp.”

Christian picks up the large tumbler he’s drinking from and points it toward the stage. “We could even have our wedding here.”
I rest my chin against his back, brushing off the ridiculous notion, focusing instead on how good he’s going to look in a tux—way better than Jillian. Maybe he could even grow his hair out a bit…

“Will there be rings at this wedding?”

Christian turns around. “Rings?” He takes a drink. “Well, let’s see…I’ve got mine already”—he nods toward his crotch—“but you…” He takes my fingers between his. “I don’t know where we’ll ever find one that fits you.”

He puts his drink down and spins me around like we’re about to waltz; then he presses me up against the metal sink. His hands play with the edge of my tight dress.

“Maybe I should have taken a different detour tonight.” I brace myself against a wooden ledge.

“Yeah? Did you get a better offer from some wanton sex-pot lesbian?” Christian’s teeth gently bite at my neck.

God I love the way his stubble feels on my skin. “I won’t say I didn’t.” I place my empty ring finger on his left hand. “But it’s easy for things to get precarious, know what I mean?”

“Oh, I know, HJ.” His cheek grazes against mine. “I’ve heard all about the revolving door of men.”

I roll my head back to feel more stubble and open my eyes for just a split second, though it’s enough time for my gaze to land on the top shelf of liquor, on a bottle of…Lagavulin. I close my eyes again. Not wanting to think about Phillip, or our now-strained relationship—or when he called me into his office yesterday, and I had to endure that awkward sexual tension…

I feel Chistian’s mouth brush my shoulder.

“All in the past.” I run my hand over his head. “Now, let’s talk some more about that ring.”

I feel him nibble at my ear. “What are you gonna do to earn that ring you want so bad?”

“Earn?” I pull his head away.

He pulls me tighter. “Or more like…” He fingers my side thoughtfully. “Show me how badly you want it.”

I push away and turn to face him. I place my hand over his left pec and smile. I leisurely pick up his drink and walk out from behind the bar, towards the stage.

To Be Continued…

COPYRIGHT
Sex, Life, & Hannah::Volume 3, Spring Season by Dorota Skrzypek.
Copyright 2012 by Dorota Skrzypek.
ISBN 0-9768869-2-1
All Rights Reserved.

Read the entire Sex, Life, & Hannah Summer Season on Amazon now!

Read More

Revolving Door of Men

Revolving Door of Men

Posted by on Aug 18, 2013 in SLH Excerpts | 0 comments

From Sex, Life, & Hannah::Volume 3, Summer Season (CHAPTER 24: LOSING YOUR VIRGINITY)

I’m standing outside Clark and Chopper’s guest bathroom, knocking on the door because Deirdra has locked herself in.

“Don’t you even try to judge me!” Deirdra yells from behind the door.

I shout at her to let me in.

“You and your constant revolving door of men!” she shouts back.

Christian, who’s trying to pry the bathroom door open with an inadequate screwdriver he pulled out of Clark’s toolbox, raises an eyebrow to me before going back to the task at hand.

“You probably let every guy who buys you dinner bang you in the ass!” she goes on, letting out her pent-up hostility towards me.

Christian stops again. “You know, HJ, I think you’re right. I think we do need to get to know one another better.”

I continue banging on the door.

“This is completely your fault!” I hear Chopper bark as he heads down the hallway carrying two full cocktail glasses. “You just had to bring Tigger into this house…I told you there was something off about her.” Chopper arrives at the door Christian and I are huddled at and tells us to each take a margarita.

“Oh, my fault.” Clark is hot on Chopper’s trail with two more drinks. “Because the affair you had last year with Bill the Coke Dealer has nothing to do with this!”

Clark hands one of the cocktails to Chopper.

“Hey, mister,” Chopper retorts, “let me remind you that you wanted to fuck Bill the Coke Dealer, too.”

He points. And we all turn our attention to the man sitting on Clark and Chopper’s couch holding a bag of frozen vegetables against his face.

“What?!” Bill removes the bag and unties one of his boots. “And where’s my margarita?”

Fifteen minutes later, we’re all on our second round of drinks, and now Chopper’s the one banging and yelling. “You better open this door right now before we start tearing your room apart to look for everything else that’s mysteriously gone missing over the last few weeks!”

Bill lets out a soulful sigh. “You know, I could’ve told you it’s a mistake to bring a cokehead into the house.” He purses his lips around the edge of his glass. “They steal.”

“My god!” Clark, who is now sitting next to Bill, suddenly exclaims. “Who did your pedicure? I love that ever-so-slight hint of sparkle—and no calluses…amazing.”

Bill peers down at his feet. “You know Frank, the guy who owns the rare Indian cycle shop—”

Christian’s head pops out of the toolbox he’s been rummaging through again. “There’s an Indian cycle shop in L.A. now? I’ve been looking for a ’74 SE for years.”

Bill eyeballs Christian…like he’s assessing the pedigree of a race horse. “I could make an introduction,” he says.

“Speaking of introductions…” Clark leans forward. “Is Hannah going to introduce us to her latest conquest?”

Conquest? Does everyone in my life consider me a tramp?

To Be Continued…

COPYRIGHT
Sex, Life, & Hannah::Volume 3, Spring Season by Dorota Skrzypek.
Copyright 2012 by Dorota Skrzypek.
ISBN 0-9768869-2-1
All Rights Reserved.

Read the entire Sex, Life, & Hannah Summer Season on Amazon now!

Read More

Heartbreak Hotel

Heartbreak Hotel

Posted by on Aug 13, 2013 in SLH Excerpts | 0 comments

From Sex, Life, & Hannah::Volume 3, Summer Season (CHAPTER 23: WHEN DESTINY CALLS)

It’s 9:35 p.m. I’m supposed to be getting in my car and leaving, to make it home by my and Christian’s agreed-upon time, but instead, I’m in complete emotional trenches. I’m on a really great date with a really great man whom I haven’t figured out how to break up with yet.

I push my chair back. “Where’s the ladies room?”

Phillip stands and rounds the table. I feel his hand on my arm. He guides me in the right direction and I feel his hand brush up my side.

This is the longest we’ve ever gone without breaking out into a heavy make-out session, and I feel the tension as he moves closer to me…but I move away again. I start walking toward the bathroom, wishing I could sprint away from it all.

I push open the bathroom door, slam both hands down on the bathroom counter, and look at myself in the mirror. What are you doing, Hannah? My emotions are playing a tug of war. You’re engaged, in love, confident in your decision to be with Christian—even though, yes, it did all happen very fast…I look at my left hand and its empty ring finger…I need to pee.

I sit on the toilet, my hair buried in my hands. I rub my scalp. Why is this so hard? I love Christian, I want to be with Christian, but… Why am I still attracted to this man? Yes, he’s rich and powerful, and he rides around on private planes and yachts, and looks really good in a suit…but he’s also selfish, obsessed with his business, and fixed, because he already has a family. He’s not even a good kisser. I grab some toilet paper, wipe, and pull my pants back on.

Washing my hands, I look in the mirror again. I should have never agreed to this “date.” But if I can’t handle a breaking-up-with-someone date, maybe I shouldn’t be getting married. You’re just getting cold feet, Hannah. Pull yourself together, stop drinking the magical imported Japanese wine, and break up with the guy!

I walk out of the bathroom.

When I come back out, the waiter is back at our table. I sit down and look at the small plate in front of me; it has a flower on it.

“This is called the pearl of Urasawa.” The waiter points to my plate. “And you must peel back every petal to enjoy. It has been my pleasure serving you tonight; please stay as long as you like.” The waiter bows to me and then to Phillip, and walks away.

“Phillip,” I say, reaching for my glass of water this time, “I really need to talk to you about something.”

He looks at me, not a concern in his eyes, and starts peeling back the petals of his identical dish.

Still not knowing how to start what I need to say, I mimic what he’s doing; and as soon as I pull back the third petal, I notice something inside. Something opaque and gold and…holy shit, it’s a pair of pearl earrings.

“Everything is edible,” Phillip says putting a flower petal in his mouth.

“Really…?” I pull out the earrings. “Even these?”

“No, those are for you.” He’s stone-cold serious. “To go along with this.” He pulls out a light purple silk satchel from his pocket and places it on my side of the table.

I open it and look inside. I slowly withdraw a long strand of white pearls that perfectly match the earrings. Oh my god. I drop my head into my hands.

“I apologize for my sister being presumptuous.”

I look up.

“About the details of our relationship.”

I start to think that maybe Ireland is right. That God is coming back with a vengeance, on us all; for playing rock, paper, scissors during church sermons with my only friend from school who was also forced to go; for refusing to play the Virgin Mary during my fourth-grade Nativity play; and for being too hungover most Sunday mornings to even think about praying for forgiveness.

“Phillip, we can’t have a relationship, and it has nothing to do with your sister.” I let the strand of pearls drop back into their satchel. “I mean, it does, partially—but in general, I’ve been thinking about things, and I just don’t think it’s the right thing for either one of us.” I pull the satchel strings closed. “You have a business to run, and I don’t want to be responsible for…anything. I just…I just want things to go back to the way they were.”

Phillip pushes his plate to the side and I can’t read the expression on his face. I arrange the earrings on top of the satchel and slide his present back across the table. “I’m sorry for agreeing to this tonight. It wasn’t right.”

Phillip looks at me, his expression still blank. “If you’re concerned about compromising our working relationship, I understand. And I respect your decision.” He slides the satchel back across the table. “But this is still for you.”

I gulp down the rest of my water and tell Phillip that I have to go. He wants to call me a cab, but I’m suddenly feeling very sober, so I tell him he doesn’t have to. I grab my clutch— and not the satchel of pearls. When I turn for the door, the restaurant feels emptier than when I arrived—except for Phillip, still sitting at the only occupied table.

To Be Continued…

COPYRIGHT
Sex, Life, & Hannah::Volume 3, Spring Season by Dorota Skrzypek.
Copyright 2012 by Dorota Skrzypek.
ISBN 0-9768869-2-1
All Rights Reserved.

Read the entire Sex, Life, & Hannah Summer Season on Amazon now!

Read More

I Want To Marry You

I Want To Marry You

Posted by on Aug 9, 2013 in SLH Excerpts | 0 comments

From Sex, Life, & Hannah::Volume 3, Summer Season (CHAPTER 22: GETTING PROPOSITIONED)

“HJ, why are you getting involved with a man who has three kids with a woman he’s never been man enough to stay with and who’s been indicted on suspicion of embezzlement?”

I feel my cheeks redden, realizing there’s even more I don’t know about my new lover. “Is this what you’ve been doing, spying on the people I’m dating?”

“Just looking out for you, HJ.”

“Why?” I demand, pulling my hand away from his.

Christian extinguishes his cigarette and curses under his breath. “Because I love you!” he shouts, “and I want to fucking marry you!” He throws his arms up as if he’s just said something I should have known all along.

I’m hit by a sudden adrenaline rush. Over the last three years, I must have had a million thoughts about marrying Christian Knight. But just as many times I’d put him in the empty-promises box.

“Oh, that’s really fucking amusing, CK!” My adrenaline turns to anger. “Poor little me, dating some guy you don’t approve of—again.” I grab the wine bottle. “Is this your idea of taking pity on me? So that what? So that I can break up with someone who probably will never be there for me and marry someone else who never will be either?” I start dumping whatever is left of the Merlot into my glass, specks of red flying in every direction.

Christian stares, and then throws back his head. “Goddamn!” He starts laughing. “You think this is a joke!” He slaps his knee. “Of course you do—because I haven’t whisked you away on a private jet, or a boat, or have a ten-carat ring in my pocket.” He stands up and kicks his chair, breaking off the remaining back rest. “You are such a self-absorbed little bitch sometimes.”

I swallow what’s in my glass. “Excuse me? I’m self-absorbed?” I stand and put my hands on my hips. “You’re the one who comes and goes as he pleases, answers phone calls when it’s convenient, and returns voicemails, texts, and e-mails ‘when he can,’ while I’m left printing out his e-mails and coveting his saved voicemails like they’re one of the Seven Wonders of the World.” I push my index finger into his chest. “You know what? Fuck you!”

“Ahhhh!” Christian screams up at the ceiling. “You wanna talk coveting? I covet your face; your smile; your body, every time I’m privileged enough to touch it; your voice, whenever I hear it on the other end of the line; every text I get from you; every e-mail you type, even when you’re telling me you never want to see me again; the fucking stairs you walk up to get to my shithole apartment; the chair you sit on across the table from me; the chessboard I never move because I pray we get another chance to play. I covet you so fucking much I can’t stop thinking about you even when I’m getting a fucking hand job from some whore in Thailand.” He punches the wall. “Do you think about me when you’re off doing everybody else?”

I cross my arms and turn away.

To Be Continued…

COPYRIGHT
Sex, Life, & Hannah::Volume 3, Spring Season by Dorota Skrzypek.
Copyright 2012 by Dorota Skrzypek.
ISBN 0-9768869-2-1
All Rights Reserved.

Read the entire Sex, Life, & Hannah Summer Season on Amazon now!

Read More