Me and hubbie are 10 days from departing on our amazing European vacation, and, I’m a bit nervous.
Usually when I go on vacation I’m single, looking for romance, or with a new lover, high on romance. I’ve never been on vacation with a lover that I’m trying to re-ignite romance with.
I have no doubt it will all be fabulous. I will be done with all my client work. I will be done with the final draft of the next Sex, Life, & Hannah book. Hell, we’ll even have our taxes filed by then. So there will literally be NOTHING to do for three weeks except soak up everything London, Paris, Rome, and whatever small Italian town we decide on, have to offer. I honestly can not remember the last time I had NOTHING to do for three weeks.
And maybe this is exactly what our romantic life needs to get back on track. Maybe getting away from the daily grind that has completely saturated our life over the last couple years will bring that spark back, re-focus our relationship so that we can look at each other in a different way; a way that has nothing to do with cleaning the bathroom, or buying food for the week, or running that errand, or organizing those papers, or paying those bills.
As much as I love that my husband is one of my best friends, I don’t want to just be friends with my husband. I want to lust again. Sure, lust is one of the seven deadly sins, but what is life without a little bit of sinning every now and then? I refuse to accept that my once awe-inspiring sex life is over at just-shy-of-35. I have needs, and desires, and my dreams can attest to it. Seriously, if there is any truth at all to dreams actually being an altered reality then I wanna go live there for a while.
So I’m super excited, but also a bit nervous. Because part of me thinks that if I don’t have at least ONE non-self-induced orgasm, my marriage will be over. And although that may sound completely ridiculous and extreme, it’s how I feel, right now. Selfish, probably, yes, and maybe that means I’m not cut out for marriage, or monogomy, but to me life is about living. And yes, it’s also a major balancing act, but when the scales start to tip too much to one side…