From Sex, Life, & Hannah::Volume 3, Summer Season (CHAPTER 22: GETTING PROPOSITIONED)
“HJ, why are you getting involved with a man who has three kids with a woman he’s never been man enough to stay with and who’s been indicted on suspicion of embezzlement?”
I feel my cheeks redden, realizing there’s even more I don’t know about my new lover. “Is this what you’ve been doing, spying on the people I’m dating?”
“Just looking out for you, HJ.”
“Why?” I demand, pulling my hand away from his.
Christian extinguishes his cigarette and curses under his breath. “Because I love you!” he shouts, “and I want to fucking marry you!” He throws his arms up as if he’s just said something I should have known all along.
I’m hit by a sudden adrenaline rush. Over the last three years, I must have had a million thoughts about marrying Christian Knight. But just as many times I’d put him in the empty-promises box.
“Oh, that’s really fucking amusing, CK!” My adrenaline turns to anger. “Poor little me, dating some guy you don’t approve of—again.” I grab the wine bottle. “Is this your idea of taking pity on me? So that what? So that I can break up with someone who probably will never be there for me and marry someone else who never will be either?” I start dumping whatever is left of the Merlot into my glass, specks of red flying in every direction.
Christian stares, and then throws back his head. “Goddamn!” He starts laughing. “You think this is a joke!” He slaps his knee. “Of course you do—because I haven’t whisked you away on a private jet, or a boat, or have a ten-carat ring in my pocket.” He stands up and kicks his chair, breaking off the remaining back rest. “You are such a self-absorbed little bitch sometimes.”
I swallow what’s in my glass. “Excuse me? I’m self-absorbed?” I stand and put my hands on my hips. “You’re the one who comes and goes as he pleases, answers phone calls when it’s convenient, and returns voicemails, texts, and e-mails ‘when he can,’ while I’m left printing out his e-mails and coveting his saved voicemails like they’re one of the Seven Wonders of the World.” I push my index finger into his chest. “You know what? Fuck you!”
“Ahhhh!” Christian screams up at the ceiling. “You wanna talk coveting? I covet your face; your smile; your body, every time I’m privileged enough to touch it; your voice, whenever I hear it on the other end of the line; every text I get from you; every e-mail you type, even when you’re telling me you never want to see me again; the fucking stairs you walk up to get to my shithole apartment; the chair you sit on across the table from me; the chessboard I never move because I pray we get another chance to play. I covet you so fucking much I can’t stop thinking about you even when I’m getting a fucking hand job from some whore in Thailand.” He punches the wall. “Do you think about me when you’re off doing everybody else?”
I cross my arms and turn away.
To Be Continued…
Sex, Life, & Hannah::Volume 3, Spring Season by Dorota Skrzypek.
Copyright 2012 by Dorota Skrzypek.
All Rights Reserved.
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