Posted by on Aug 24, 2010 in Life and Style | 0 comments

identity-crisis-2

People want blogs to be authentic. Blogs are like the reality TV of books. People want to read the grit of someone’s life, the dirty little secrets, feel they have the ability to press play on some hidden recorder inside a person’s mind.

A la my identity crisis, my being stuck. I don’t know what to do with the “Hannah Blog” anymore.

When I first launched the new Sex, Life, & Hannah website it was because I realized a static destination with information about my book series wasn’t going to cut it. Especially because I had no publicist, no advertising, no marketing budget. And this is so NOT true: if you build it, they will come. Maybe if you’re doing porn. Or self-help. But if you’re just peddling your fictional wares…nope.

I discovered blogging. Albeit, seven years too late, but the concept seemed brilliant to me, especially because I was no html whiz and relied on my web guy for every update. Blogging seemed to be the answer to everything. And I was going to make Sex, Life, & Hannah a lifestyle destination, where people could read about relationship stuff, fashion stuff, sex stuff…I realize a year later, I missed the point of blogging.

The girl that built my Facebook page for Sex, Life, & Hannah said it best: Blogs are about people, not news. Unless you’re the Huffington Post, which calls itself a blog, but it isn’t really in my mind. It’s just a more liberal CNN.

When people read the Hannah Blog (Brenda went on), they want to know what Hannah is thinking, feeling, doing, not the latest celebrity gossip, unless it’s Hannah’s take on some celebrity gossip. I did agree with her. But honestly, I couldn’t wrap my head around the concept. Frankly, I still can’t. I mean, I AM Hannah. Hannah was birthed from me, inspired from my life, my stories, but she’s stuck in 2007 fictionally, and my 2003 diary entries, and I am in 2010. Married. And this is a big deal. I can write fiction about fucking around with multiple men in multiple states like it’s nobody’s business, but if I’m not actually doing it anymore… How can I blog about it going on in the present tense when my present tense revolves around all the fun issues that come with being married, and an unemployed writer that’s limping along a small business?

I’ve thought of all sorts of solutions. Hiring a single girl in her late twenties to be the face and blog voice of Hannah. Reposting my old diary entries as new. Posting new chapters I’m working on from upcoming books as blog entries. Starting a whole new website just for me, and ALL my books and book ideas, and deleting all the other sites (but hubbie would probably fucking kill me). But I don’t know. The indecisive libra in me refuses to make a decision, make a move…and maybe none of it would matter anyway. Isn’t it all just a fucking shot in the dark anyway. I could do it the “right” way and still get no where. Writing is like any other art form. You never know what’s going to resonate with people.

Don’t worry. I’m not bringing anything to an end just yet, or discarding any of the above ideas. And I’m not going to stop writing. That is the one thing I am sure of, as a writer. I’m just venting about the current state of affairs. After all, isn’t that what you’re supposed to be able to do on a blog?

p.s. feel free to vote on any of the above ideas.