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The official website of the Sex, Life, & Hannah chick lit book series.

1 woman, 7 friends, 4 seasons, 36 chapters, and a lot of men...

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Destiny

Posted by on Jul 20, 2006 in Life and Style | 0 comments

For the most part I really truly believe that you are the controller of your destiny. That even if there is this predetermined path you’re supposed to tread, in the end you always have a choice. Like if a psychic warned you about your impending death in a car accident, you could start refusing to get into cars, and thereby change that fate.

But this whole getting-married-to-Metal-Guy thing, which has turned into an ordeal, is starting to make me believe otherwise.

I have received so many signs that our marriage is doomed, but yet, I still want to do it. Everything from tarot cards, to number games, to flipping coins are all foretelling of a disastrous outcome to our union, but I refuse to change my mind and break it off.

This is making me believe that either I am hard core in love, retarded, or that there really is a greater power that controls everyone’s destiny. And regardless of how much warning you get, when it’s your destiny, you can’t do anything to change it.

Maybe if you could change your destiny it would fuck up the world too much. Like maybe I’m supposed to marry Metal Guy, not for the right reasons, but because we’ll eventually have a child that will change the world, and if we don’t get married and don’t have this child, the nations will crumble, the sky will fall, the oceans will dry up, anarchy will ensue, and the world will go up in flames.

So if we really all have a destiny, and we really have no control over it, then I guess we all just need to stop freaking so much, stop worrying so much, stop trying to predict our future, and start enjoying the fucking ride.

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I had sex with Metal Guy.

Posted by on May 18, 2005 in Life and Style | 0 comments

On our fourth date, we had sex.

He drove into town, and I picked him up at his parent’s house. We took a drive down the coast and stopped in for a drink and a snack at some restaurant where we shared a lounge chair and did a lot of kissing.

The sex was so passioante. It wasn’t fucking or just sex, it tore into my soul.

But Metal Guy lives in L.A. and I’m in San Diego for now. And he’s not financially stable. Although maybe all that doesn’t really matter.

I would like to think that two people that love each other and want to spend the rest of their lives together will overcome all obstacles. Do I know that we want to spend the rest of our lives together? No. But seriously he’s the most refreshing change that I’ve had in my life in a long time. He calls me, he emails me, we talk about things, everything, he doesn’t leave me hanging; no games. He’s affectionate, and in public. I’ve never been with a PDA guy. He’s sweet, sincere, and incredibly sexy.

There’s a part of me that’s scared of falling in love, only to have to let it all go in the end, because of one complication or another. But falling in love feels so good; I’d be a fool not to want to at least linger in it for a while. Like I did with Mr. Smyth. And yes, he broke my heart, but when it was good, there was nothing better. Nothing can replace the feeling of being in love.

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