by hannah
February 14th, 2011
I have mixed feelings when it comes to Vday. It’s good to celebrate love, where would we be without it? But I think if you really love someone, you express it every day, by doing the small things, like saying “I love you”, or making them dinner because you know they’re coming home late, or holding their hand when you go for a walk, or taking care of them when they’re sick, or just talking and listening when they need you. Love is not a one-day gesture, it’s a daily committment.
by hannah
February 11th, 2011
I’ve been asked to fill out an application form to be on a reality TV show about love. Here is my answer to the question: Do I, can I, should anyone believe in love?
Love? Oh it’s out there and very real. Scary real. Love takes control of your body and your mind and makes you think crazy thoughts, like: I hope he accidentally knocks me up. And when he doesn’t, it makes you do crazy things…like get married. There’s no logic, there’s just passion, and lust. And there’s a real biology behind the whole love thing; it’s not just a figment of our imagination. Nature wants us to fall in love; wants us to keep propagating the species, that’s why falling in love, and being in love, gives us a dopamine fix straight to where it counts the most. There are other chemicals involved too, but it’s the love dope that keeps us intrigued, wanting more, and seeking out that penis thrill ride over and over again.
by hannah
November 5th, 2010
Love is an addictive drug. No seriously, it is, and 83% of you agree. Or maybe the more accurate thing to say is lust is a drug. As Lee Ann Obringer writes in her awesome article on how love works ,”the same chemical process that takes place with addiction takes place when we fall in love”. Here’s some cliff notes from the article:
Dopamine is the “pleasure chemical,” producing a feeling of bliss. Norepinephrine is similar to adrenaline and produces the racing heart and excitement. When two people have sex, oxytocin is released, which helps bond the relationship. The more sex, the greater the bond. Vasopressin, is the chemical associated with the formation of long-term, monogamous relationships. The longer we’re together with someone, the more oxytocin and vasopressin start interfering with the dopamine and norepinephrine pathways, and the passionate love fades as attachment grows.
Let me break down this addictive euphoria for you in real terms: You see someone. You think they’re hot, i.e. I want to make out with you. You talk to them. You like them even more i.e. I want to get naked with you. If you’re at a club, you end up dry-humping them on the dance floor. Maybe you pry yourself off, because you don’t want anyone thinking you’re a slut, or maybe the feeling is so intense you say fuck it, go home with them, and have a wild passionte night of sex. The next morning, you try to remember their name, so you can exchange numbers, because you really do want to go on a date with them. And when that date goes extremely well you start OBSESSING, idealizing, pining for the phone calls, the next date, the next night of hot sex, until you have The Conversation that establishes you’re in a committed, monogomous relationship (or not). As the months, maybe even years go by, you fall more and more in love with them, until…your “date” nights start turning into renting movies, cuddling up on the couch, and falling asleep by 11PM, and you realize you’re having more fun with your vibrator. You still love them, care more deeply for them than ever, and would take a bullet for them, but the high is over, and you find your eye wandering more and more…
